Setting Boundaries
Mothers are famous for trying to do everything for everyone. While we have to make sure our families basic needs are being met, there’s a fine line between caring for them and being a slave to them. So how can you make sure your needs aren't as neglected as your bikini line? By setting boundaries.
Boundaries allow you to protect what's important to you. Without them you're one flap away from flying over the Cuckoo’s nest. Life becomes chaotic and your time is no longer your own.
Tips For Setting Boundaries.
- A good way to establish boundaries is to set a minimum and maximum that you’re comfortable with. For example, if you find that you're wasting time checking email all day, you may set a boundary around how often you log on. The minimum could be once a day so you can stay on top of your inbox. The maximum could be three times per day so you can answer the ones that need your immediate attention. Setting minimum boundaries will prevent you from putting things off. Setting maximum boundaries will stop you from placing unrealistic expectations on yourself.
- Get clear on the life you want to live and then set the appropriate boundaries around that lifestyle.
Here are some different areas in which you could set boundaries.
Self-esteem
These are the boundaries that protect your self worth and self-respect. What will you demand of yourself and others to protect this? Maybe you'll stand up for yourself the next time you feel slighted. Or maybe it means living your life with integrity and doing what feels right for you in spite of what others may think. Body
What do you need to do to keep your body functioning properly? What limits do you need to set around health, exercise and nutrition? Do you need to set a minimum and maximum around the times per week that you exercise? Do you crave caffeine and sugar? The amount you ingest per day or week is a great place to set boundaries with yourself. Time
We all wish we had more time. What boundaries do you need to put in place to make sure you’re not wasting it? Maybe you keep social lunches and personal phone calls for weekends only. When you set clear boundaries, you begin to master time management. Money
In tough financial times like we are currently in, it’s important to have strict boundaries around your finances. In fact, the reason why the world is in this crisis is because many people had no financial boundaries in place. Setting minimums and maximums around your money or spending habits just might save you from financial ruin. Relationships
What boundaries do you need to set to nurture your relationships? What is the minimum amount of time you need to spend with your loved ones to feel like you’re honouring them? What’s the maximum amount of time you can spend with other people in your life before you start to feel claustrophobic and smothered? Get clear on the boundaries that feel comfortable for you and then talk to the appropriate people about your needs.
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